I regenerated last week.
Perhaps an inappropriate term, but it stems from a conversation on the Gallifrey forums, where the bizzare question was asked - "Which regeneration are you on?"
Timelords have 12 regenerations, leading to 13 lives. One gets the impression a proper upstanding Gallifreyan spends his time in contemplation, then when the time comes, meditates for a bit and surrenders one life to start another. The Doctor never gets the chance to do this as he tends to die violently and out of the blue. It also explains why his personality flails about so much between actors. You couldn't establish stable government or friendships if you knew your President could, at any point, regenerate into a loony. Yet the character of Borusa is seen four times in the show, every time played by someone new, but always holding a high government position. This suggests that controlled, premeditated regenerations, aided by fellow Timelords in a relaxed enviroment, are far more stable, and result in similar incarnations. Whereas the Doctor's new form is determined by chaotic factors such as location, nearby companions and recent history, and there's evidence that the nastier and complicated the regeneration, the nuttier the next incarnation (in particular, a slightly batty 4, totally unstable 6 and perpetually amnesiac 8 being the direct results of the show's three nastiest deaths)
It's not death so much as rejuvination, and you get a strong suggestion that regenerations are really reactions. Pacifistic 5 turns into hardline 6. Dark, willing to compromise 7 turns into candyfloss and kittens 8. And so on. 9, who was willing to blow up any number of planets to defeat the Daleks, turns into 10 within moments of coming to terms with that decision and then deciding not to commit the same crime a second time.
Hence the question - which regeneration are you on? A few months back I thought, "eeek - the first", because even though I'd been overdue one for a while, I was clinging on Master-like to my first form for all it was worth. But time was finally up this week, so off I went and here I am, all fresh and spangly. And not a moment too soon.
So yes, it's another case of me mixing my realities up - but it's one I choose to believe, literally as well as figuratively, and it feels great.
So what's changed? It's more a process of codifying. Vague ideas about religion have just come together into genuine spirituality. All my concepts of gender, race, age, family, relationships have coaleced into (at last!) a strong sense of individual identity. All my ideals and years of liberal leanings have exploded into a genuine attempt to live a truly ethical life. And all this within the last few days, which is why it feels like a shot in the gut then a burst of life, instead of a sensible slow progression. I don't really intend to talk about this in detail, as almost every facet of Unmutual II would offend some different sensibilities, and I like you all to much to risk offending or upsetting any of you. One curious byproduct of all this is that suddenly, and I have no idea why, I feel totally at home in the Maughan and can navagate it perfectly and without difficulty. Perhaps that, too, is the equivalent of the Doctor sitting up and suddenly being able to play the recorder?
But the newest revelation is that I really have no choice but to become an at-home vegitarian.
I admit, this is partly Calypso's fault, who is as we speak attempting it with far more success than me. You can tell her off for being an appalling influence later. With her attempting it for a week, and actually sincerely succeeding for a whole nine days, it suddenly occurred to me that for all my ethical fretting this was an angle I'd never considered.
It's ironic, really, because until last month Friend 1 was a vegitarian, and had been for some five years. After years of attempting to persuade me, she gave up citing bad health and a loss of conviction. She's right. And I still hold by the key arguments against vegitarianism which I've been pestering her with for those five years: I believe it is unhealthy, denying yourself a burger will never defeat the industry and that the human race has evolved to eat meat.
But like Friend 1 recently found fault with her reasoning, so I have with mine. To be a healthy vegitarian, you have to make your cooking far more creative - what better excuse to do something other than rely on pasta? Eating meat is the lazy option. By forcing myself to find alternate protein, perhaps I'll become healthier overall?
I've never believed the industry can be defeated, whether by my refusing to drive and only using public transport, using recyclable milk bags or boycotting Nestle and Proctor & Gamble. In reality, all that will happen is I'll miss out on Kit Kats and Pringles. The companies won't fold and be ethical - I actually think ethical big business is an impossibility. But that doesn't stop me doing my bit for carbon pollution and animal testing. With my acnowledgement that these actions are useless, yet still worth doing, it's hypocritical to continue eating meat on the basis that we'll never be more than a minority. Not a single less cow will die. Like not shopping at Primark, this is more a move for my personal peace of mind. Unless I was on the point of starvation, I would find it very difficult to actually kill an animal for food. On this basis, I do not believe I have the right to let someone else do the dirty work, nor to disassociate a bunny in a field with the pie on my plate. In all this, I admit, there is probably some longterm Doctor Who related reasoning.
And finally, that humanity has evolved to eat meat. Humanity has also evolved to wear clothes, to regulate sex through marriage, to help those less fortunate than us and to not stone to death anyone who covets his neighbour's donkey. My father's argument falls down here - his claim that we are at the top of the food chain, and it's how nature works. Wrong. As an advanced species, we have a responsibility. We don't shit behind trees any more - we've removed almost every natural, animal instinct we ever had. All primal logic decrees that if someone sins against you, you bash his brains out with an ox jawbone, yet we try to rehabilitate and forgive. Animals abandon deformed, lame and old members of their community. We try and help them, celebrate our differences, invent wheelchairs. Animal society is regulated by the survival of the strongest, with the alpha lion electing himself head of the pack. We have developed democracy, so that (in theory at least) the lion most suited to the job, in the opinion of the pack, is given control. In other words, we have distanced ourselves so far from primal existance that our animal nature is no longer an adequate excuse. Is it not the duty of a self-professed "advanced species", one that can invent the limerick, the spice rack and the bassoon, to better ourselves?
My father and I discussed all this yesterday, and he pointed out that if not for its usefulness to humanity, the cow would have long since gone the way of the wild boar and English wolf. Like cats and dogs, the cow has found a way to almost become a parasite on humanity, making itself useful in order to survive. But maybe it's time to get rid of it? The enviromental impact of the cow is crippling - bigger than airplanes. And now I'm going to pinch Calypso's link: http://www.flex.com/~jai/articles/101.html
Its not the biggest sacrifice in the world - I was never a massive eater of meat to begin with. It's the little things I'll miss, hot dogs, sausage rolls, hoisin duck wraps and in particular, sweets. Those sticky things made of e-numbers, sugar and animal fat - how I'm going to miss them! I always thought the Percy Pigs were foul, though, for containing real pig...
Panic attack over. Maybe I won't give up marshmallows - they may have to be the exception.
The biggest problem with ethics is how it steamrollers out of control. I've already had it pointed out to me that the milk industry facilitates the death of hundreds of bull calves in a year, and there's not the slightest way I could ever give up milk. Should I now reject leather as well? What about eggs? The instant you start boycotting one or two clothing chains, you realise that they're all as crooked as one another. Looking around my surroundings, I wonder exactly how much exploitation has gone on in the artificially-lit room around me - from my leather shoes and watchstrap and cheaply produced clothes, to my plastic packaged lunch. I wonder if you could ever define it in terms of blood?
So I'm laying down rules. Above, I stated I am an "at home" vegitarian, which is a cunning way of cheating. I exculde occasions when others are cooking for me unless it is easy to do so - partly because I don't want to irritate or inconvenience my meat-eating friends, mostly because my dad has an intolerance to gluten so mum already has to cook wheat-free dinners. Demanding that she somehow finds a meal free from both wheat and meat is very unfair indeed. Even though this is in part an attempt to broaden my culinary horizons, I'm still a very fussy eater, and the vegitarian options at restaurants are still appalling. So while I will attempt to avoid them, I don't want to rule out meat dishes in restaurants entirely. Nor do I want to be obsessive about it - it's not like accidentally eating a bit of fish...
...it's not like accidentally eating a bit of fish is going to cause me a violent allergic reaction, nor totally invalidate my own brand of lazy veggie. So I won't need to pester waiters to ensure my chips have been fried in naturally occuring plant fats.
So if that's proved anything, it means I'm going to be a pretty appalling vegitarian. But it's a start, and I have no good reason not to. To be honest, I don't want to wholly remove meat from my diet because coeliac disease is hereditry, and if I get myself to the same point as Friend 1 - where the very idea of meat is disgusting - then discover I have to go wheat free, I'll be down to soup and noodles for the rest of my existance.
Perhaps an inappropriate term, but it stems from a conversation on the Gallifrey forums, where the bizzare question was asked - "Which regeneration are you on?"
Timelords have 12 regenerations, leading to 13 lives. One gets the impression a proper upstanding Gallifreyan spends his time in contemplation, then when the time comes, meditates for a bit and surrenders one life to start another. The Doctor never gets the chance to do this as he tends to die violently and out of the blue. It also explains why his personality flails about so much between actors. You couldn't establish stable government or friendships if you knew your President could, at any point, regenerate into a loony. Yet the character of Borusa is seen four times in the show, every time played by someone new, but always holding a high government position. This suggests that controlled, premeditated regenerations, aided by fellow Timelords in a relaxed enviroment, are far more stable, and result in similar incarnations. Whereas the Doctor's new form is determined by chaotic factors such as location, nearby companions and recent history, and there's evidence that the nastier and complicated the regeneration, the nuttier the next incarnation (in particular, a slightly batty 4, totally unstable 6 and perpetually amnesiac 8 being the direct results of the show's three nastiest deaths)
It's not death so much as rejuvination, and you get a strong suggestion that regenerations are really reactions. Pacifistic 5 turns into hardline 6. Dark, willing to compromise 7 turns into candyfloss and kittens 8. And so on. 9, who was willing to blow up any number of planets to defeat the Daleks, turns into 10 within moments of coming to terms with that decision and then deciding not to commit the same crime a second time.
Hence the question - which regeneration are you on? A few months back I thought, "eeek - the first", because even though I'd been overdue one for a while, I was clinging on Master-like to my first form for all it was worth. But time was finally up this week, so off I went and here I am, all fresh and spangly. And not a moment too soon.
So yes, it's another case of me mixing my realities up - but it's one I choose to believe, literally as well as figuratively, and it feels great.
So what's changed? It's more a process of codifying. Vague ideas about religion have just come together into genuine spirituality. All my concepts of gender, race, age, family, relationships have coaleced into (at last!) a strong sense of individual identity. All my ideals and years of liberal leanings have exploded into a genuine attempt to live a truly ethical life. And all this within the last few days, which is why it feels like a shot in the gut then a burst of life, instead of a sensible slow progression. I don't really intend to talk about this in detail, as almost every facet of Unmutual II would offend some different sensibilities, and I like you all to much to risk offending or upsetting any of you. One curious byproduct of all this is that suddenly, and I have no idea why, I feel totally at home in the Maughan and can navagate it perfectly and without difficulty. Perhaps that, too, is the equivalent of the Doctor sitting up and suddenly being able to play the recorder?
But the newest revelation is that I really have no choice but to become an at-home vegitarian.
I admit, this is partly Calypso's fault, who is as we speak attempting it with far more success than me. You can tell her off for being an appalling influence later. With her attempting it for a week, and actually sincerely succeeding for a whole nine days, it suddenly occurred to me that for all my ethical fretting this was an angle I'd never considered.
It's ironic, really, because until last month Friend 1 was a vegitarian, and had been for some five years. After years of attempting to persuade me, she gave up citing bad health and a loss of conviction. She's right. And I still hold by the key arguments against vegitarianism which I've been pestering her with for those five years: I believe it is unhealthy, denying yourself a burger will never defeat the industry and that the human race has evolved to eat meat.
But like Friend 1 recently found fault with her reasoning, so I have with mine. To be a healthy vegitarian, you have to make your cooking far more creative - what better excuse to do something other than rely on pasta? Eating meat is the lazy option. By forcing myself to find alternate protein, perhaps I'll become healthier overall?
I've never believed the industry can be defeated, whether by my refusing to drive and only using public transport, using recyclable milk bags or boycotting Nestle and Proctor & Gamble. In reality, all that will happen is I'll miss out on Kit Kats and Pringles. The companies won't fold and be ethical - I actually think ethical big business is an impossibility. But that doesn't stop me doing my bit for carbon pollution and animal testing. With my acnowledgement that these actions are useless, yet still worth doing, it's hypocritical to continue eating meat on the basis that we'll never be more than a minority. Not a single less cow will die. Like not shopping at Primark, this is more a move for my personal peace of mind. Unless I was on the point of starvation, I would find it very difficult to actually kill an animal for food. On this basis, I do not believe I have the right to let someone else do the dirty work, nor to disassociate a bunny in a field with the pie on my plate. In all this, I admit, there is probably some longterm Doctor Who related reasoning.
And finally, that humanity has evolved to eat meat. Humanity has also evolved to wear clothes, to regulate sex through marriage, to help those less fortunate than us and to not stone to death anyone who covets his neighbour's donkey. My father's argument falls down here - his claim that we are at the top of the food chain, and it's how nature works. Wrong. As an advanced species, we have a responsibility. We don't shit behind trees any more - we've removed almost every natural, animal instinct we ever had. All primal logic decrees that if someone sins against you, you bash his brains out with an ox jawbone, yet we try to rehabilitate and forgive. Animals abandon deformed, lame and old members of their community. We try and help them, celebrate our differences, invent wheelchairs. Animal society is regulated by the survival of the strongest, with the alpha lion electing himself head of the pack. We have developed democracy, so that (in theory at least) the lion most suited to the job, in the opinion of the pack, is given control. In other words, we have distanced ourselves so far from primal existance that our animal nature is no longer an adequate excuse. Is it not the duty of a self-professed "advanced species", one that can invent the limerick, the spice rack and the bassoon, to better ourselves?
My father and I discussed all this yesterday, and he pointed out that if not for its usefulness to humanity, the cow would have long since gone the way of the wild boar and English wolf. Like cats and dogs, the cow has found a way to almost become a parasite on humanity, making itself useful in order to survive. But maybe it's time to get rid of it? The enviromental impact of the cow is crippling - bigger than airplanes. And now I'm going to pinch Calypso's link: http://www.flex.com/~jai/articles/101.html
Its not the biggest sacrifice in the world - I was never a massive eater of meat to begin with. It's the little things I'll miss, hot dogs, sausage rolls, hoisin duck wraps and in particular, sweets. Those sticky things made of e-numbers, sugar and animal fat - how I'm going to miss them! I always thought the Percy Pigs were foul, though, for containing real pig...
Bugger. Marshmallows. I'm going to have to give up marshmallows...
Panic attack over. Maybe I won't give up marshmallows - they may have to be the exception.
The biggest problem with ethics is how it steamrollers out of control. I've already had it pointed out to me that the milk industry facilitates the death of hundreds of bull calves in a year, and there's not the slightest way I could ever give up milk. Should I now reject leather as well? What about eggs? The instant you start boycotting one or two clothing chains, you realise that they're all as crooked as one another. Looking around my surroundings, I wonder exactly how much exploitation has gone on in the artificially-lit room around me - from my leather shoes and watchstrap and cheaply produced clothes, to my plastic packaged lunch. I wonder if you could ever define it in terms of blood?
So I'm laying down rules. Above, I stated I am an "at home" vegitarian, which is a cunning way of cheating. I exculde occasions when others are cooking for me unless it is easy to do so - partly because I don't want to irritate or inconvenience my meat-eating friends, mostly because my dad has an intolerance to gluten so mum already has to cook wheat-free dinners. Demanding that she somehow finds a meal free from both wheat and meat is very unfair indeed. Even though this is in part an attempt to broaden my culinary horizons, I'm still a very fussy eater, and the vegitarian options at restaurants are still appalling. So while I will attempt to avoid them, I don't want to rule out meat dishes in restaurants entirely. Nor do I want to be obsessive about it - it's not like accidentally eating a bit of fish...
...crap taramasolata. Hmmm, may have to make another exception...
...it's not like accidentally eating a bit of fish is going to cause me a violent allergic reaction, nor totally invalidate my own brand of lazy veggie. So I won't need to pester waiters to ensure my chips have been fried in naturally occuring plant fats.
So if that's proved anything, it means I'm going to be a pretty appalling vegitarian. But it's a start, and I have no good reason not to. To be honest, I don't want to wholly remove meat from my diet because coeliac disease is hereditry, and if I get myself to the same point as Friend 1 - where the very idea of meat is disgusting - then discover I have to go wheat free, I'll be down to soup and noodles for the rest of my existance.
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